Thank you. Thank you for everything you have done for me. The list of things you have done for me is forever long. Thank you for saving me, for telling me that I was beautiful even when I didn't see it myself. Thank you for being patient with me in those times where it took me what seemed like forever before I opened up, and for still being patient with me. Thank you for showing me that I was worth loving, even when I didn't love myself; for giving me a self-confidence I've never had.
Also, I love you. I don't say that lightly, I say it full of emotion. I love you with all of my heart and then some. I am literally counting the days until it is permanent, 220 in case you're wondering. I love literally everything about you, even your imperfections because they're what make you, you. I love how you wrinkle your nose when you smile and laugh. I love the way you worry about me and make sure I'm safe. I love the way you love me. I love the way you make me feel. I just love YOU. -Forever Yours
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There's a song by MercyMe called "Dear Younger Me" and it's caused me to think pretty deep about myself. When I look back on my past thus far, I haven't had it easy. But would I go back and change it if I could? This is the million dollar question.
In first grade I experienced my first death of a close family member and first funeral. In second grade I was told my dad wasn't going to make it; he did, but he is forever disabled. In third grade my best friend's mom passed away in an accident. In fifth grade my uncle died unexpectedly and it hit me hard. In middle school I dealt with an emotionally and verbally abusive parent, a suicidal best friend, and bullying. By spring break of my 8th grade year, my parents were divorcing and I moved an hour away to a new town. I started high school in a new area not knowing anyone. And like any other person, I've made some mistakes. It's not always easy for me to think of these memories. In fact, I still get emotional when talking about a few of them, but these experiences have been what has shaped me into the person I am today. If it wasn't for my parents' divorce, I never would have moved and never would have went to a different school which means I wouldn't have the best friend that I do now and I wouldn't be marrying my wonderful fiance this summer. I wouldn't be as close to my mom as I am if not for the emotional/verbal abuse we both experienced and the eventual divorce. These experiences tore me down, but then they built me up into the strong and independent individual I am today. They made me more mature than my fellow peers, something I feel benefited me. I have an amazing step-dad who became a huge father figure in my life and pushed me to do bigger and better things. I had more opportunities at my new school than I ever would have at my old school. These experiences sucked at the time and sometimes they still do, but they have shaped me and my life in a wonderful way. If asked to go back and change something, I don't think I would. |
AuthorSee the "About" section for a little about me! |